Life of Ning The Logbook
Welcome to Life of Ning Magazine.

Updates on my life.

These unfiltered streams of thoughts offer my candid life and reflections. No polished prose here, just real authenticity. Heads up: movie spoilers may sneak in. Enjoy exploring!


Death Is a Collective Grief That Brings Families Together

Grandma is dying; there’s no way around it. She’s already 94 years old, so no one is surprised, and we’ve all been preparing for it in our own ways for a long time. Still, when the doctor said she had less than a month, putting a definite deadline on something we were too scared to think about, it made us realize that it’s really happening and not just some arbitrary prediction anymore.

Sitting in a hospital room together, sharing our silent grief, puts things into perspective. This is truly the most important thing we all face together as a family. We might not grieve in the same way, but we’re all grieving together. All those interactions that seemed trivial before have become more meaningful than ever. Though we didn’t say much, we felt closer than ever before. We can even notice each other’s pain through even the tiniest expressions.

I'm not sure how long we’ll get to sit together like this, but I’ll cherish every smile and tear I saw today and every day after until her time comes. I’d hate to see her go, but I know it’s for the best. And I know I don’t have to bear the grief alone because we’re all sharing the pain.

The only thing I wish for her is that she could remember all of us—the grief, the love, and the memories as a family—in her final moments, ensuring she’s not alone in her journey. She’s lived a long life; it’d seem hard to remember everything, but I want her to remember that she’s always loved by everyone around her. I truly hope she will take our shared love in this family with her last breath.

We’re in this together, and we’ll get through this together. But most importantly, this family will keep her in our hearts forever.


P.S. My selfish wish is to see her live through this month because it’d tear me apart every year to grieve her during my birth month.

My New Super Simple Weekly Planning Setup

So, I tried bullet journaling in 2022 and then evolved into my own system mixing both analog and digital tools. But this year? I fell off the planning wagon hard. Like, barely-planned-a-thing hard.

Here are the lessons I learned from my epic planning fail:

  1. Too much on my plate: Digital tools let me add infinite tasks, which is a recipe for overload.
  2. Guilt trip: Seeing unfinished tasks made me feel paralyzed. I knew I couldn’t finish them in time but didn’t want to erase them either.
  3. Out of sight, out of mind: Planning is pointless if you forget to look at your plan. I always forget to check my task manager and then my notebook planner of choice.

Tasks vs. life experiences: I collected tasks more than memories, when it should be the other way around.

So, for the rest of this year, I'm starting fresh with a new setup using just three tools: Weekly Planner, Memo Pad, and Reminders App.

Weekly Planner

I use Kinbor, the budget-friendly knockoff of Hobonichi Planner, as my weekly planner. I also have Hobonichi Weeks which I use for memory keeping at the end of the month.

My system is simple:
- Left side: Time blocking space.
- Right side: Tasks that will get transferred to available time slots.

At the beginning of each week, I'll list all the tasks I want to do, prioritize them, block my time accordingly, and transfer them into my calendar or reminders app. Then I'll write a weekly reflection at the end of the week.

Memo Pad

This is my daily reflection tool for the week.

  • Top of the page: Write down the date and jot down The Weekly Highlights at the end of the week.
    - Bottom of the page: List the four most important things to get done that week.

At the end of each day, I'll write down up to three highlights of the day. If there's a specific task for a particular day, I'll note it in the right corner and erase it when it's done.

Back to the Gym

After two months of a hectic life dealing with health and family issues, I finally made it back to the gym for the first time. I couldn't believe how quickly my strength and endurance had declined in such a short amount of time. I can still manage a poorly executed pull-up, but I can't do a full pistol squat anymore 😩

I knew regaining my strength, skills, and stamina wouldn't be easy. But I was determined to push myself and see how long it would take to return to where I once was. 💪

Wisdom comes from reflections.

Some reflections come from my life, some from My Musing Blog, and The Narratives in media I've experienced. 

You can follow my life simply by visiting this blog; there will only be occasional RSS feeds, newsletters, or cross-posting. I prefer to keep my personal life contained within this space :)

Magazine Issues
2024



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